To My Grandkids,
Change, although a beautiful thing, is exhausting sometimes.
This past month in the new home has been filled with love, friends, laughter, and time shared between E and I. It feels so good to be in our own space- a space where the walls are covered in echoes of late night giggles, or soft jazz humming out from behind the shower curtains. A place snuggled within warm lights and held down by a hot cup of cocoa in the corner where the rocking chair sits. This home is art, painted with intentions of love and growth, a clean canvas now covered with a mosaic of the brightest colors.
The physical space is a beautiful representation of my inner realm, however, while my physical space is clean and tidy, my inner space has become jumbled and shaken.
One of the most important things I've learned on my growth journey is to honor the seasons we go through. This means listening to your body, being gentle with yourself, feeling all your feelings, and allowing yourself the time and space you need to sort things out again. I preach and preach to people to pay attention to your personal needs and act accordingly, and yet I still find myself feeling guilty when I don't practice upon my own words.
Yes, this chapter is filled with much excitement and new changes flowing in and out of my life, and with that comes a lot of energy spent... So I have been resting. Holding my word in my heart, and only giving when I feel full enough. Enjoying moments, and adjusting to this new flow that my life moves with. Things are different, as am I, and I am allowed to rest and recharge as this season calls me to. I am okay, even if I haven't reached my full potential this week or the last. I am okay, even if I am only just now starting to get back into my practices again after days, weeks, even months for some. A break does not mean I have failed, because I am allowed to take breaks.
Some days I have to constantly remind myself that I am okay, and that's alright. I hope you know that it's okay for you, too. You're allowed to FEEL all of your feelings, good or bad. You are allowed to take breaks and tone it down a notch when your body tells you it's time.
You are human, and you are ALLOWED to BE exactly as you are.
I love you exactly as you are. I love you exactly as you have been, and I love you exactly as you will be.
Someday, kid, when you feel like your cup is only half full- allow yourself to REST.
Maybe with me, and a cup of hot chocolate, and some fresh baked cinnamon rolls :)
To My Grandkids,
Change is such a beautiful thing.
Lately, a lot has changed in my life. I went from living on a Caribbean island to living in the snow-kissed mountains again. The shift was long, and forced me to be patient and stay in the present moment, a practice I had been slacking on prior to the move.
When we flew back to the states, I got on a train back to Montana. I've spent the last 2 years of my life traveling now, and although my heart feels called to hundreds of places all over, Montana never fails to be the one place that feels like home. 'Home' to me isn't Missouri where I spent most of my life.. Not at all. Home to me is the place where I blossomed, learned what I truly wanted, learned who I really am, discovered my souls purpose, and took the first steps to living my dream life. Home is where I became me- fully, truly, and unapologetically ME. (and that did NOT happen in MO)
A week later, I found myself on the road again, driving states away to a place I'd never been. A place where the red mountains glisten in the hot summer sun, and the snow calls to skis and snowboards country wide. This is a place of new discovery, growth and divine BEING. This new place I arrived at, in the mountains of Utah, truly does feel like home.
This place is my own. There are no expectations to meet except mine, and so far they have been exceeded. This place I pass through may not be permanent, but for now, my heart fits perfectly in this big city apartment. I am exactly where I am meant to be. The universe never fails to align me through space and time, defying all odds to position me in the place of my best interest, the place of my highest growth, and the place for my highest self to SHINE and THRIVE. Big things happening here.
Life. Is. So. Good. And I am so grateful.
I cant wait to tell you the secrets these mountains hold, but those stories can wait until we meet in person..
Your ever growing, ever learning, ever LOVING, Nana J :)